Mynahs in the Morning

send some love

2008-12-13T03:17:00.000-08:00

why is it that protest work has such little resonance with people? i mean, you look at the work of leon golub, his wife nancy spero, lee bonticou, ed keinholz, and this is really powerful stuff that has such a political and socially challenging viewpoint and what relevance does it have for us today? it means everything, but no one wants to pay any attention to the wars in iraq and afghanistan, it's a shameful state of affairs, especially when you consider that obama wants to escalate the war in afghanistan. my wife and i went through such a terrible ordeal in our lives with her two deployments, yet our friend who lived in chicago, who made such a vocal fact of her participation in all those iraq war protests, showed us zero support when my wife was deployed in iraq. i dont understand it. i dont understand how people have grown so callous and forgetful. these things that were set in motion eight years ago continue to move in their path. the defense department has already been reconfiguring all those deployment schedules of all those army and marine brigades who had been scheduled to go to iraq. there are soldiers that you can lend a hand to, reach out, lend your support to.
www.uso.org
my family and i are no longer connected to the military, but we still know and support those people over in iraq and afghanistan. you should too.

card shards

2008-12-01T13:23:00.000-08:00

yay! got the image for the show card for the january show at sagefarm! very nice! im excited about this show, these are huge drawings that i did, the image here is just a detail of two panels

stones from strangers

2008-12-01T11:25:00.000-08:00

hello all, look for new work on the website soon, i found my lost software and im trying to catalogue all the work from the last five months. this encaustic here is very new (two days) and im really excited about this medium. yes david, i took her comments as positive, i've just heard it alot. anonymous poster says i complain too much. not really, she doesn't know me, but this is a hard gig and sometimes one has to vent. but point taken anonymous, chin up, chest out, forward march!

2008-10-30T11:20:00.000-07:00

they need to find this man's genitals before he goes on another rampage.

little gripes

2008-10-17T21:37:00.000-07:00

i dont rant very often, but there was a woman in sagefarm gallery today, suzanne i believe, who was looking at my paintings...nice woman, and i appreciate her being there and checking my work out, she seemed to genuinely respond to it...BUT, she did make some comments that have eaten at me all the rest of the day, things which i have heard before which bug me to no end...1: these would be great bigger, and 2: these need to be in new york chicago san francisco etc. ok people, i am here! right here in taos fucking new mexico and i am so lucky to be able to just be showing where im at. and if you want to see my work large, like 5, 6 ft, then be my patron ok? im a fucking poor working artist and im doing my best working with what i have. and when i have worked large, NO ONE buys em, no one. so if you want to be my patron and step up and support my artistic growth, please, by all means i welcome the relationship. otherwise...well, my computer is fixed but my head is stuck in a mega drawing hole, so updates to my website will be on hold until i finish this work. that being said, man i cant wait to share these with everyone.

another day

2008-09-03T12:02:00.001-07:00

the floor of my studio, isn't it lovely...i think my pants get up when im gone and go wild in that place.

yeehaaw

2008-09-02T17:16:00.000-07:00

thanks to all the good people who came out and saw me and my work this weekend at the festival here in taos, i really appreciate all the help and compliments, even the rude stuff was fun. thanks especially to randy lagro, here's to kindred spirits.

some news

2008-08-28T23:05:00.000-07:00

ok, im in the studio tonight, supposed to be working but mostly ive been cussing out this painting ive been working on. sometimes youre on sometimes youre off. but for those who visit this blog, please note that i have a website up now,

http://www.christopherstjohnfinearts.com/

ive only just started adding work to it, so its a little bare, but fear not, intrepid web divers, it will be full. in the news section of my site i noted that i wont be using this blog anymore, but upon further consideration, i decided that would be foolish. so, continue to look for work and news here, but not as much as i had before. not as if i was posting alot anyway. some other news:

i will have a booth at the labor day arts festival here in taos this weekend, look for me in the park and come buy some stuff! or just say hi, you dont have to part with your dollars if you really dont want to.

passing through

2008-07-14T11:43:00.000-07:00

one month since my last post, havent been able to put much on here since the scanner is in the studio and the laptop tends to stay at home, fewer distractions that way when i'm working, have been having a great time in taos so far, busy though, getting ready to buy some land, which is so beautiful out across the gorge. have met some great people in taos and santa fe so far, thanks jill, for the conversation and stopping in to my booth at the art fair in santa fe.

home

2008-06-15T02:25:00.000-07:00

so we traveled across an ocean and a desert and found our way to the mountains of new mexico. and the cats came too, which is pretty amazing when you consider a cats point of view, or three cats point of view, which was our burden. somewhere in arizona we acquired a dog, and now the household is a bit more full than it was. so far so good, i have a studio, i have been working my ass off and getting that crazy twitch in my eye that i get when i overwork myself, kachina has been taking it easy, and we've been looking. devin is more concerned about his stuff, mainly his wii, but the movers took the slow boat and weve been camping out in our home for the last month or so. taos is pretty cool, but small...right now thats a good thing.

ages and ages

2008-05-06T21:24:00.000-07:00

truth be told, i had sorta forgotten about this little blog of images and words, then i get a nice email from a ready rabbit and its great music, and suddenly, bam. heres a link to their myspace page, its great when i discover music that i like. http://www.myspace.com/readyrabbit check em out, their very cool.

so, hawaii and i have had irreconcilable differences and we are officially splitting up this thursday, dustier and more mountainous places in the west call our names, and we are heeding that call. when we arrive, i think my little blog will get some attention again for a while. i'm always amazed to find out that people read this thing. yeah, i know, jennifer, i'm silly.

in the meantime, this suicidal rabbit has a sad story to tell. enjoy.

sunny art delight

2007-12-03T23:17:00.000-08:00

www.bridgeartfair.com/miamiinfo.htm

hey kids, just some drawings, my wife really likes this group of drawings, ill be posting the bunch of them over the next few days, check the link out, im showing with all the art stars this week down at miami for the big art fair down there. awol gallery was kind enough to invite me along, so hopefully i get some rockstar art kudos for my customs/shipping woes. and some moolah would be nice too, but we can't be too greedy, my fleet of guardian angels would not appreciate it. or would they? ill have to ask 'em.

article

2007-10-30T21:44:00.000-07:00

www.honoluluadvertiser.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20071028/LIFE09/710280324/1076/LIFE09

hey kids, no images today, but i made it into the paper again, this was a nice q&a given by victoria white. thank you victoria, for a lovely article, and for a nice lunch.

dreams

2007-10-22T01:01:00.000-07:00

howdy kids, i know i haven't posted too much, we got rid of our desk, so managing the scanner and the laptop and the printer has gotten a little trickier, but the house is looking much nicer. if any of you readers on oahu haven't gone to see it, get thee gone to the HPU main campus and see my show, Big Hand Blues! its up until November 16 so you have plenty of time to go see it every day. really, you should do it and stop reading this. i have two solo shows coming up next year, one in march at bethel street gallery (old becomes you) and another show at the honolulu academy of art's art center (transformations from dream geography). for that show i have started keeping a more focused dream journal, from which i have posted a few excerpts. so i should have lots of very interesting images to share in the coming months. cheers.

long breath

2007-10-08T01:04:00.000-07:00

i know i know i know, its been ages since my last post, but believe me, i have been busy, had a solo exhibition go up at Hawaii Pacific University, and i am finally taking a little vacation from all this work and stress (stress from my wife's recovery). and i should write more, but i decided i should post the magazine article for all those people who can't go out and get it for themselves. cheers. more work to follow, for those who follow.

dog days

2007-08-09T19:59:00.000-07:00

nothing to say, feeling good these days

Big Drawing Stew

2007-08-09T01:36:00.000-07:00

2007-08-09T01:35:00.000-07:00

2007-08-09T01:33:00.000-07:00

2007-08-09T01:31:00.000-07:00

lots of drawings posting today, from the past two days, a selection, my wife is rocking out on guitar hero 2 while i do this...pretty funny to listen to since she's not so good.

smoke

2007-08-02T03:02:00.000-07:00

www.mixedplatespecial.com

so, i got featured on the above linked website, feel free to check it out. for those of you getting to my blog from the website, feel free to go in internet circles until you fall on the floor bleeding from your eyes. it's a cool, quiet night, pink clouds float over the waianaes that, six hours ago, were up in flames from errant artillery fire. i fail to understand how such a small place can be used as a military playground. but the light streaming through the smoke this evening was beautiful, especially all the refractions creating hundreds of little jagged, broken rainbows, and the reds the color of blood oranges.

staring

2007-07-26T01:47:00.000-07:00

more boys, nothing much to say except that blockbuster hollywood movies make the back of my brain ache, we took my son and his friend to see transformers tonight, the best part was watching his enthusiasm and excitement...it sucks, i'm older and these movies are so full of holes and flaws, but if i were ten again a movie like that would have been so tremendous to me, im glad he can enjoy it, but then again, im glad i can see it for what it is...its funny, there was a lot of racism in the film, but its the usual kind of racism in these movies where anything important is being done by white folks

presenting

2007-07-24T18:32:00.000-07:00

i wanted to say thank you to all the good folks who came out to see me at my booth at the haleiwa arts festival. the response i get never fails to surprise me. huyen, here is your painting.

mug

2007-07-19T02:00:00.000-07:00

so, this is the other magazine that i was getting featured in, or rather on....no artwork inside, just lawyerly articles, not being a lawyer i cannot speak of its merits, but i do know that is one fine painting on the cover. faith's home, and we're all in the warms snugly cave of love.

all god's children ain't god's children

2007-07-14T03:19:00.000-07:00

so, some days i wonder how long you have to work at something like this before certain people stop making references to you like "an occasion when newcomers break the surface of visibility". fuck 'em, i say. but then again, many days i fear i will always be a beginner, and always be regarded as such.

flying flights

2007-07-11T05:16:00.000-07:00

"toll the bell, pay the private eye, all is well, twentieth century dies" david bowie friggin rocks, listening to the outside album....good news for me and my son! faith is flying in tomorrow for good good goodness! yay, im freakin happy! and for those who wonder, yes she's ok.

party people eat peacocks

2007-07-07T19:25:00.000-07:00

some drawings from the magazine party...so i had a weird synchronicity yesterday, i read a news article about a deranged man who killed a peacock believing it to be a vampire. later on during the day i had to go the gallery to drop some things off and as i was walking through china town this homeless guy goes by on a bicycle shouting out "LOVE YOUR PEACOCK!", but in this very deep lowing kind of voice, all full fathom five and full of dark menace. i dont think it was a good week for peacocks around the world.

fancies

2007-07-06T01:58:00.000-07:00

more art extras for my straight to video super painter movie, "the saga of junior", as narrated by morgan freeman. coming soon to a headspace near you. cough cough

dust mops

2007-07-02T19:53:00.000-07:00

a couple of paintings that just went to the gallery and me having mad scientist hair day...cheers

idolatry

2007-07-02T02:42:00.000-07:00

so, the magazine party was very chic, lots of sexy wealthy looking adults slinking around in expensive rags and big erotically engineered shoes, shoes that you would have no choice but to worship if they were placed on pedestals around the room. i didn't talk to too many people, the editor, the writer and his date, a few other folks who found out who i was and snatched my sketchbook out of my hands to ogle over my drawings. i had been drawing people quietly in a corner for a while, plied with sushi and other tasties by the overbearing but friendly wait staff. tomorrow will post some of those drawings. the article looks really good...all shiny, but the layout is nice, the colors are good, a little off but not too much, and although the article has a goofy edge to it, the gallery has already gotten alot of folks in wanting to see more of my work. so good news that is. on friday, i had to rush my butt back down to the honolulu academy of arts because masami teraoka was signing a new book that has been published of his work, a retrospective...MAN! that was so fucking awesome to meet him, hes been a hero painter for me since before i started making art....i was so nervous, i had to write my name on a paper so he could sign the book and my hand was shaking quite badly, he said i had a holy name...the guy was wearing pajamas and a fanny pack, which was so awesome....hes 71 and has an eight month old daiughter. when i was blabbering away about how much i admired him i told him i had a painting in the wing behind him...i did it sheepishly and i dont know if he looked, he made a note though....i was just happy to meet him, i finished five paintings this weekend, all that excitement hasn't waned either.

cuteness overload

2007-06-27T00:25:00.000-07:00

i have the cutest kitty ever...enough said.

woes not

2007-06-26T21:01:00.000-07:00

so yeah im still working on these every day...havent gotten sick of this subject and find something instructive and revealing every time i paint them...especially the failures, many of which ive done this month...not that anyone looks at these or this blog...have been very busy, lots of stuff coming up that im preparing work for and i feel behind, my wife says i say the same thing every time i have shows and end up doing too much...but i really feel behind, and this whole pace will continue until september....ugh, i hope to get a little break in august. my work is being featured in the magazine modern luxury hawaii, http://www.modernluxury.com/, for their summer issue, and i have to attend their party down in waikiki on thursday....all alone probably. i havent seen the magazine yet, but on the editorial page of the website theres a lovely photo of the actress carrie-anne moss. id buy the magazine just for that.

not so exquisite corpse

2007-06-23T05:14:00.000-07:00

so my son picked up this puzzle ball from a vending machine when i was out buying art supplies, he didn't know it was a puzzle just thought it was a little rubber ball...but hes a trooper and broke it apart excited by the challenge...until he tried to put the thing together. as we were driving back he complained about the directions being confusing and i joked that it was probably some weird broken translation of chinese to english. i hadn't looked at them, and later when i did i really had a good laugh. these instructions are really a gem...lets all decompose and have some fun!

clouds

2007-06-22T00:14:00.000-07:00

i really love the clouds around where i live, against the mountains, ive been taking pictures of the skies every day for a couple of weeks now, and i dream about ufos made from plant leaves and giant square airplanes....

more good news

2007-06-20T15:57:00.000-07:00

so, i havent posted in a bit, again, but have been busy. these are what became of some of my little flower girls...good news for me, the hawaii state foundation on culture and arts is acquiring my cloudeaters painting (the one in the artists of hawaii show) for their art in public places collection. hooray! i should mention that the little woman, Geraldine King Tam, who presented me with the award at the artists of hawaii show is the widow of Rueben Tam, for whom the award is named. she called me a few days later and wanted to send me some old exhibition catalogues of her late husband's work, which tickled me because i had been trying unsuccessfully to find out more about him. he was really a fantastic landscape painter, ive been way impressed with his work, especially the paintings he did when he lived in maine. geraldine king tam is a phenomenal artist too, a botanical illustator, so i feel very lucky with this whole experience.

recognition

2007-06-12T17:39:00.000-07:00

http://starbulletin.com/2007/06/10/features/story01.html

http://www.honoluluacademy.org/cmshaa/academy/index.aspx

so no images today, but i have a bunch to put up, but silly in the hole me didnt realize i had made it into the local paper for the artists of hawaii show at the honolulu academy of arts. the first link is for the review, the second is the academy website. i wasnt going to write about going to the opening since i mostly had a dismal time. my wife couldn't be there with me, and alone i was a nervous wreck. the little old lady who presented the award to me was all of two feet high and she shouted up at me "YOU LOOK LIKE YOU PAINTED THAT THING!". funny, not too many people approached me with questions, and one of the women who did looked at me like i was crazy when i tried to explain to her what i had in mind with the work. met a great guy, hal lum, really liked his work, he got one of the bigger awards. it was ok, lots of wealthy folks running around gobbling up the free grub and doing the art shuffle that folks do when they are excited about buying a piece of work. they act like theyve won the lottery when they find a work they want to buy, and seem like they would be very happy announcing to everyone their "discovery". after wandering around i spent most of my time in the collections looking at the medieval and early renaissance paintings, there were also two really large masami taraoka paintings that i hadnt seen before that i spent some time with, and a really stunning collection of german expressionist graphic work in the same gallery. there was this etching by otto dix of a dominatrix which blew me away, pig lady with a whip and pistol in fishnet stockings....she could teach me a thing or two....anyway, enjoy the links

march line

2007-06-05T19:47:00.000-07:00

sweat

2007-06-04T01:24:00.000-07:00

hammock wanted

2007-06-02T00:42:00.000-07:00

sprawl

2007-05-31T18:30:00.000-07:00

i checked in on a friend's blog where she posted an image of her workstation, and i was tickled when i thought about what a disaster my drawing table is compared to her relatively neat and airy space. so, for the idle and the curious heres a photo of the place i spend many hours each day. i won't embarrass anyone with photos of the painting studio, it's a mess.

snail trails

2007-05-31T00:54:00.000-07:00

i havent posted in a bit, not much to say, the memorial day holiday always gets me down, even when the wife isnt off in some war. i think its an odd holiday to have a barbecue, which is what my family does back in tennessee, which is what alot of people do, i guess. well, i like most of this stuff, but it grows.

2007-05-31T00:52:00.000-07:00

spook

2007-05-24T00:38:00.000-07:00

ill be the first to admit that this painting really creeps me out. funny, i didnt find the photo of the kid creepy, just his mouth.

rump

2007-05-23T00:57:00.000-07:00

so, more wild mood swings, not much else, brass fittings and dirt clods

blue

2007-05-22T04:27:00.000-07:00

so, devins kempo instructor really ticked me off tonight, i guess he and his family went on a trip to washington dc and got a picture taken with the president. he was just showing off to his students, which bothered me the most, the way people will brag when they meet famous folks. he seemed most surprised that the president wasn't as tall as he thought he was, which says alot about him. i would rather he just taught kempo and not try to impart his philosophies and values every class. its not bad, really, but its definitely the all american variety. as he was describing how nice the president was, i wanted to shout out, "hey, that bastards the reason why my son hasnt seen his mother in a year, show some sensitivity you fuck!" but, all i could do was draw on the sidelines and wait with the other parents. its weird, hawaii swings democratic but these people are really conservative. the instructor then went on and on about how there are so many museums in washington dc, but then he couldnt think of one, not a single one. funny. he remembered that they went to the "place where they make the money" but then couldn't remember what that was called. ugh, just stick to the kempo and send a postcard next time. all the students were given little UN pins, and i still dont know what thats all about.

frazzle

2007-05-18T02:37:00.000-07:00

so, i think someone got confused, but the "hot time" title of yesterdays post of work referred to something my wife and i talked about yesterday, about how we just have to slog through this "hot time coming up", meaning our respective summers, hers in iraq, and mine in hawaii. i pretty much count my wife as the only reader of this blog, and the work i post on here gives her a chance to see the stuff im working on everyday, to give her a better sense of my life while shes away from it. its not a nudie thing, and i guess i should have been savvier about the title i posted knowing how bad spam and that sort of thing is. oh well...

hot time

2007-05-17T00:57:00.000-07:00

the cat had an adventure tonight, my son left the back door open and out he slipped into the night, gone for several hours, my radar went off when he was near the house, and i went out and there he was, all triumphant. he acts like king of the house now, big cat, ive seen the real world what are you? had a nice long conversation with my wife, feels like months since i had a good conversation with her, we talked about taos and her dad and her grandmothers passing....the waiting game that we are playing...

tides

2007-05-15T21:10:00.000-07:00

i had the best dream this morning..among others, despite not sleeping well...i was swimming in the middle of the cold atlantic, its grey, metallic with big rolling clouds low above me. in my ocean dreams im usually frightened of the water, afraid of the monsters lurking in the depths, but in this dream i was totally at ease in the dark waters, and there were these incredibly large waves rolling up toward me, and i thought that these waves would come and submerge me and i would drown, but as the monster wave grew higher it would gently lift me to the top and i was being carried thousands of miles on my back on these great waves, and when that one would pass another would come and carry me further, and this dream atlantic ocean had no end...im a bit tired, ive been watching my son's friend since her mom is having some health troubles.

stream

2007-05-14T22:34:00.000-07:00

lots of water flowing today

2007-05-14T22:32:00.000-07:00

breadcrumbs

2007-05-13T05:02:00.000-07:00

3 am

2007-05-11T06:20:00.000-07:00

its interesting, the painted studies walk hand in hand with the work that goes on in the studio, but the small ink portraits are little peaks over the horizon, projections into the future, i really dont know what will come out of them, they seem really odd to me. i can see them changing, wanting to take hold of the image and make the drawings stronger, i didnt want to do that at first, i wanted some faithful reproductions, but i realized that was false and insincere and so they grow. i am reading bradbury to my son now, something wicked this way comes and tonight we finished with the chapter where charles halloway worries about 3 am (thats when the wicked carnival arrives in town), bradbury's description of this hour is good, he describes it as this low point, the closest we can get to death than at any other hour during the day, and this really rings true for me, this is the hour i always finish my work during the week and the hour when sleep is most welcome. well, its after 3 am now, and i guess i should turn in. cheers.

movie day

2007-05-08T21:57:00.000-07:00

some people seen while at the movie theater with my son.

set

2007-05-07T23:13:00.000-07:00

a cat on your lap is a wonderful thing, except when your legs fall asleep. things are ok, my wife has been down, and i get frustrated when she talks to me about feeling low since there is little i can do with her being far away, except offer what support i can over the phone and send her nice things in the mail. what i want to do is hold her...this war takes its toll on a relationship.

misting

2007-05-03T22:36:00.000-07:00

misty world misty heart today, but i got some good news, one of my paintings got into the artists of hawaii show out here, so im tickled about that. i thought one of my pieces would make it but i was anxious about it. lawyers want one of my painitngs for a publication, which cracked me up when the gallery called and told me that news. but thats two publications this summer, which is kind of weird. not too many sales, but lots of folks lookin'....

time

2007-05-03T00:06:00.000-07:00

so, i havent wanted to post alot, its been awhile since my last posting, i think i have been somewhat averse to writing things, maybe it has something to do with this artist's statement ive been working on. that thing is funny, because whenever i'm done working on it, i always go back to my national science foundation proposal for their artists and writers program. kind of weird, and i cant really describe how the two are feeding into each other, except for this current series i have envisioned antarctica as a kind of exit point. certainly i feel lost with this work, at least in trying to describe it, the hpu show, that is. the paintings and drawings themselves, whoosh stuff is flowing out, but ive really wrapped my hands around something that i cant articulate...had some kind of food allergy flare up the other night, but i listened to the voices inside and now things are ok. it was my sons fault, he wanted a bean burrito after karate practice. i like these portaits, they make good daily studies...

adrift

2007-04-19T02:26:00.000-07:00

set

2007-04-14T01:52:00.000-07:00

bad news on the way

2007-04-12T02:14:00.000-07:00

tides

2007-04-08T02:49:00.000-07:00

nothing worthwhile to say, its all gibberish

currents

2007-04-06T22:21:00.000-07:00

somebody got a new toy...

eddies

2007-04-06T00:20:00.000-07:00

cold hands

2007-04-05T00:21:00.000-07:00

kerouac wrote that we are all just breath cut with flesh...a very apt statement for me today.

mouth

2007-04-04T01:00:00.000-07:00

nothing to say today, dont want to wrap my head around words.

plodding

2007-04-03T02:10:00.000-07:00

i haven't posted from my sketchbooks in a while, so heres some, and a painting. just some movie theater people, and one school kid. cheers.

ghosts of guns

2007-04-01T02:39:00.000-07:00

ok, im on a photo kick, these are from my polaroids, i love taking that camera outside, its wonderfully immediate and gratifying. lots of the images i have to set aside as junk, but theres usually several from each batch that are worth keeping. i take better landscapes, the pictures i shoot of people just look like snapshots, and they are as never as interesting as i found the person to be before i photographed them. probably because its not the tool i use to get inside people. theres a mountain range behind our house, the waianaes, and its an amazing place to get explore, its one of the few perks of this whole military thing i enjoy, since most of the ranges are closed off to the public, part of the military base. theres never anyone up there, and on the other side of the mountain range there are all these amazing concrete structures where chemical munitions and whatnot are stored. creepy stuff.

grassy fields

2007-03-30T22:52:00.000-07:00

i have an old brownie hawkeye that i like to play around with, the kind of box camera that you look down into to shoot the image, and i got these pics back today from the good folks at film for classics. all the black and whites were garbage, but the color ones turned out great...at least i think so, although i think i need to open up the camera and clean the lens, theres some kind if oily film on it...which works great for these pics, but this camera was found by a friend of mine at the dump up in fairbanks alaska, so im sure its overdue for a cleaning. theres something really nice about taking it out and shooting with it though. holding it down at your belly, it feels like centering your chi through the lens....

days

2007-03-29T22:26:00.000-07:00

its spongebob tonight and kfc, i couldnt stomach more than the potatoes, but the spongebob i could watch all day, thats funny stuff, devin's tickled and happy, he spent the day at the swimming pool with his girlfriend, tee hee. i think the neighbor woman, the one who sounds like shes from west virginia, will be happy when spring break is over, every day she yells louder at her kids and slams things around, but they run wild anyway, they have ripped the boards off their backyard fence and ripped off the gutters from the house...the garden that used to be there is a trampled dead mess, and the rabbits are gone...

spitting in the sunshine

2007-03-28T22:24:00.000-07:00

its amazing that a place like hawaii has a springtime and even more amazing that it feels lovely, cool breezes pleasant sunshine, the midafternoon light hasn't taken on the harshness of a flash bulb white that it will wear a few months from now, and the evening and morning colors are soft and gentle, pinks and mauves, its like bathing in cotton balls right now...and im so insane because today i feel fine, but talking to my wife had something to with that, the weather today just gives me that knowing nod reminding me that things aren't that bad. and sometimes i want to tell that fool to go fuck himself, but not this lovely day.

let it rain

2007-03-27T02:39:00.000-07:00

feeling very raw today, ive been working and crying all day, it just keeps coming, dont know why (except i do know its so damned lonely out here), the neighbors fucking sounds like surround sound tonight and the fat neighbor, lord spittoon, spoke to me for the first time in two years and asked me if i painted elk and deer, "you know, scenery with elk or deer". i tried to be polite. the scientologist next door has become a christian, but i think she could become a blood drinking satan worshipper and you would never be able to tell, she has no depth, talking to her is frustrating, its like talking to a piece of glass...

Progression

2007-03-25T02:42:00.000-07:00

its interesting how ideas will change and evolve and reveal new pieces of information...the portraits have become more about the form, and the figures in my kouros studies continually want to split apart, almost schizophrenic. theres drunks outside with a karaoke machine and woven hand on my ipod, what a squeeze...

three step

2007-03-24T02:23:00.000-07:00

so ive been working but reluctant to post anything, have been in a weird place trying to get back in step, but with any new series its a new dance and new song and one always has to start over, beginners mind and all that junk...the stuff i like i can't post, these graphite and crayon drawings that im totally in love with, but theyre too big for my scanner...have had good news some shows coming up and some magazine coverage, but the neighborhood grind buzzes on, our days are numbered in hawaii but theyre arent counted fast enough.

Strauss

2007-03-09T14:54:00.000-08:00

so its been about a month since my last post, have been back from california for almost two weeks now, and i haven't been able to get back to the real work, the work that carries the scent of my name years after i'm gone, it's been all about the other kind of work, papers and money and insurance and lawyers the telegraphed grids of commerce....but i had a dream this morning, something ive been waiting for, corny as it sounds that ive been waiting for some kind of sign, in this dream i'm looking out at this red island in the ocean, this island is mars the entire planet reduced to some kind of essential desert lansdscape sitting off the water of this beach, im traversing its surfaces with a girl, younger, something like a sister but not my sister, more like my charge, walking through gullies and trenches of sand, hardpan, soft red rocky sand with bits of reddish black rocks, im convinced im on mars until i see the ocean, a few hundred feet of rough water up to the island shore where i jump in and swim, walk up the beach with its lush plants and tall trees and the sister is a man now walking beside me explaining how there are many places on earth where plants will not grow and this mars in the water shouldn't surprise me, but we come to a painted white wooden stairwell with some kind of glass door, dew on the glass the whole thing is a strange tower of white wood and glass, i try to open it the wrong way but the mystery man guides my hand to the left side where the door opens and the stairwell goes up into the tops of the trees.
it's been hard to know where to start after coming back from california, im still greatly saddened by the loss of my wife's grandmother, and putting both her and barney's loss in some kind of perspective has been hard, so i think this time ive been back ive been trying to process some of that, especially for the work, but the music has started in my head today very clearly all the stuff i listen to when i paint blaring loud in my skull and i know its time to get back to the studio even if i don't know where to begin. margaret, my wife's grandmother, her clowns have been in my head too, wretched cross stitched things that she was always so proud of, the khemthongs, with their hospitality, and mark, this broken man now mended by his religion, but like a poorly mended vase where you can see the glue sticking out of the cracks.....trying to get a handle on all this....

Flying...

2007-02-10T11:48:00.000-08:00

I won't be posting anything for a couple of weeks, we've had a death in the family, just wanted to get these up before I flew out of here. Cheers.

Cat on my lap...

2007-02-05T03:28:00.000-08:00

so, i havent posted in a bit, but im still up to the same things, still working on these portraits everyday, still got some big things stewing up in the studio, its been a week for dramas, but everything has settled down, even some folks who really dropped the ball on me, its ok, we move on.

Left turn somewhere...

2007-01-30T01:44:00.000-08:00

so, ive been in that working place, and heres a small sampling of what ive been doing. the gallery took a bunch of these, which made me sad. the weather has been tempestuous the last two days, setting my thoughts and heart on fire again, reminding me that the earth doesn't slumber under a sleepy tropical delusion...the wind has been kicking up fiercely, and ive been thinking of that short story by anais nin about the sirocco, all that erotic energy. devin's response to all this has been different, all moody and emotional, easily weepy, we had a long talk about lots of things at dinner today, and we talked about how when the heavy clouds roll in they can sometimes stir up the dark sludge that lurks inside all of us and bring it to the surface.

Sleepy sunday

2007-01-21T23:27:00.000-08:00

Not much again today, just another small painting. I'm always so pleased when these studies turn out well.

Birthday boy

2007-01-20T20:19:00.000-08:00

So, it's my birthday today, my sister called to wish me a happy one, but that's about all that happened besides this lovely little painting I did this afternoon. Cheers.

On that path

2007-01-16T23:56:00.000-08:00

So its more of the same again, but I'm happy with them, continue to be surprised by them, especially the watercolors. So, my neighbor across from me has built what looks like a giant scratching post in his front yard. It's this large block of wood staple wrapped in cheap automotive carpet sitting on 2x6 supports. It's tall, like almost six feet, and he spent three days working furtively on it and filling the neighborhood with the sounds of electric saws and hammering and dropping wood. Devin and I joked that he had ordered some lions to keep him company...but it doesn't look like anything. Now that he's done with it he has left it sitting out in the front yard for everyone to admire, his struggles. In the dark it looks like the monolith from the movie 2001. This is the same man I witnessed playing darts with a crossbow, possession of which was alarming enough. This is also the same man who has a compulsive need to spit. I might have written this before, but one day working out in my carport I counted his spits and had to stop at 32. He spits when he sees me, which cracks me up. So, now I'm wondering about this new project of his that he's conjured up to protect his selfworth. When the lions are delivered, I want to be there.

2007-01-16T23:54:00.000-08:00

Kouros again

2007-01-14T23:02:00.000-08:00

So, this kouros thing, it's the barest suggestion of an idea that is pushing these figurative explorations forward, but it's taking me back to ideas that I hadn't thought about in a long while, ideas that I failed at finding expressions for, ideas that found an abstract embodiment rather than a concrete one. I don't know, I'm getting closer to something...meant to post these yesterday but three boys and their sleepover fun kept me busy all night, cleaning tang off the floors, picking up slim jim wrappers and cookie crumbs, trying to keep the spitting and tomfoolery under control. At the end of things Devin didn't enjoy his sleepover as much as his others, and our first impressions of the older boy have remain unchanged.

2007-01-14T23:01:00.000-08:00

Kouros

2007-01-13T00:13:00.000-08:00

2007-01-13T00:12:00.000-08:00

whipping boy

2007-01-12T00:13:00.000-08:00

so i havent posted anything on here for about a week. ive been working every day, but watercolor is such a tricky medium, i feel like ive done nothing but crap. i got a break last night though and was satisfied with what i produced at the end of the night. but ive been troubled lately, lots of crap on my mind, crazy words from my wife far away, and a big rock i can't possibly move. for some reason ive got this notion of a whipping boy in my head. that, along with greek kouroi, which i discovered in school. i wrote about my son and the neighborhood kids last week, kids are great at forgetting and moving on and everyone has been getting along fine, but ive still been thinking about bullies and their victims, especially after this one kid who i witnessed getting shoved around by the perpetrator shouted at me one night that the perpetrator wasn't a bully. except his mouth wouldnt let him say it right and he kept getting all tongue twisted. these are all minor dramas that fit into these broader existential vessels i fashion out of my figures. which doesn't explain a whole lot for the gentle reader (not that i have any) but there the work stands.

2007-01-12T00:11:00.000-08:00

Theme and variations...

2007-01-02T21:19:00.000-08:00

Just as the title says, 9 women and 1 man. Not much to tell today, besides rain and cold feet.

2007-01-02T21:17:00.000-08:00

A New Year

2007-01-01T21:11:00.000-08:00

A bunch of stuff for a new year, yesterday was me and my wife's ten year anniversary, but since she's deployed, we didn't get to celebrate. I felt pretty low all day, and I worked instead of celebrating to get my mind off things. Never fails to make me feel better. Even finished a painting last night, not the little one I've posted here, a big one. Happy new year.

2007-01-01T21:09:00.000-08:00

Fathers and sons

2006-12-30T00:29:00.000-08:00

The drawings I did before were about the mother so I thought I would focus on the son, but ony one got the son. The father kept creeping in, I kept wondering about the relationship with this invisible person fighting the good fight in bad places. The last watercolor here ends up being almost abstract.

2006-12-30T00:27:00.000-08:00

Denise

2006-12-29T00:23:00.000-08:00

New post, new model, this is the mother of a boy who has been a source of trouble for my son the last few days. She seems like a sweet enough woman, simple though, and caught up in her share of troubles. Something of a chain smoker from the way the house smells and the way Devin smells when he comes back from their house. I think I took care of the whole thing today, had those parent to parent talks that I hate so much. Of course I could take my friend's advice and train my son to be like some ferocious, rabid gerbil ripping the balls off any kid who so much as blinks at him wrong, but I don't raise my son to be that way, and he's too sweet for that. This woman doesn't seem to know her children very well, she has that weird blind spot that alot of people have with regard to their children's faults. Either that or she doesn't care. From the way the boy acts it's easy to imagine what his father's like, the way the boy belittles everything different from him and calls everything gay and "stoopid". Just another typical military family. But I wonder about this woman who calls me sir everytime I talk with her even though I'm a few years younger than she is and look alot younger than that. This woman who acts like a dog that's been hit too many times...

2006-12-29T00:22:00.000-08:00

More violence

2006-12-28T02:57:00.000-08:00

Well, the painting that is developing out of these studies is coming along nicely, so I don't want to spill the beans on my model. But the curious always know where to find me.

2006-12-28T02:56:00.000-08:00

Violence contained...

2006-12-27T01:44:00.000-08:00

So, I had this experience with my son's best friend's father several days ago, and he's been my subject every night since then. These are last night's drawings. Tomorrow's post will go into more detail about him and the whole weirdness, but I've been trying to get into this person's head, and while these don't succeed the way I want them to, I feel like I am getting closer. Onward winter soldiers!

2006-12-27T01:43:00.000-08:00

Short stops

2006-12-21T23:59:00.000-08:00

Just a couple of people at the local convenience store, a nice gentleman buying cheap budwesier and a really expensive bottle of hennessy, which I thought was a funny contrast but maybe the beer wasn't for him, and some kid who rode a yellow crotch rocket. My son has gotten so excited about the impending holiday, he's constantly eyeing the tree as if something might disappear or trying to find something he hasn't already seen.

Dark eyes weather...

2006-12-21T04:26:00.000-08:00

Just two local people and one not so local woman, school's out for the next three weeks, so it's going to be mostly loose ink drawings and watercolors on my posts for a while, unless devin and I go out alot, which I don't anticipate. Strange thing today, Devin and I both got very sluggish toward the middle of the day, cranky too, like our energy was being zapped by something. I don't know if he was just picking up on my vibes or me his, but it was a little odd, especially since I try really hard not to let my inner states affect him negatively. Merry solstice to all you happy pagans!